Eve of a New Life

So today is the 1st Anniversary of the start of my son's new life. Today is not his birthday but the process that became his birthday. He wasn't due for another month but complications arose and he had to be taken early. It was on this day (in the afternoon) that I had to leave work early due to bleeding. The doctor told me to go to the hospital because my dear boy would be taken by C-section in the morning. Now I have a great and bright little boy who I cherish and couldn't live without (even though he is sick today and driving his mom and dad bonkers...okay mostly dad).

Love you Cap'n Monkey! (not pictured below)

Book Review: Wideacre by Philippa Gregory

Author: Philippa Gregory
Title: Wideacre
Publisher: Touchstone Book
ISBN: 978-0-7432-4929-4
Rating: 7.5 (1 lowest and 10 highest)

I must admit that I adore Ms. Gregory's books. They fascinate me with her ability to dwell into history and manifest a story rich in detail and interest. This book was no exception and rarely disappointed. However, there was disappointment. The book, a first in a trilogy, dealt with a young woman, Beatrice, trying to keep her family home in Georgian England. This is no easy task because of the laws of inheritance. Of course she does not make the right choices (or we wouldn't have a novel), but the wrong choices are terrible. Obviously there is significant money trouble and the author spent a great deal of time and effort on going over this subject. It hit too close to home and I found myself not enjoying the book. I am all for reading the suffering of others and how they make things better. However, I found myself not wanting to read anymore because the character infuriated me with her bad financial decisions. All in all, I would recommend this book and enjoyed it. I hope the next book in the series is better.

My next book I am reading is Bellman & Black by Diane Setterfield which was published by Emily Bester Books and has ISBN: 978-1-4767-1195-9.

Have you read Wideacre? Have you read Bellman & Black? Do you have a book I should ready? Let me know.

Payday

Yep, it's payday. Probably the most depressing time of the week. You get all hopes when you get your check and then you start the bill paying. Then grief of seeing your hard earned greenbacks walking out the door. Welcome to life as an adult! That would be Mumsy's favorite saying to me. But things are bound to get better, right?! Yes, of course they are. My family and I are champions of bill paying and will continue to do so till everything is set right. Until then, water down the soup, cut the meat thinner, and read instead of a movie. It could be worse...trust me it could always be worse.

Moral of the story: Count you blessings everyday. You woke up this morning. You have a roof over your head. You are healthy. No one has died. There is food in the fridge. Take joy where you can because you do not know what tomorrow holds.

Why?!

I don't understand why some people want to blame others for their own mistakes. Then they claim that they are happy when in fact they are miserable. I don't understand why a parent should yell at their adult child and tell them they are done being a parent. You are never done being a parent. Heck, Mumsy is 60 and I am 38. There are many times I need her, even if it is just a soundboard. I am grown, have my own kids, a house, a career, and I find myself needing Mumsy to get my head straight. Being a parent NEVER stops. Mumsy is even going to a 5k with me this weekend to cheer me on.

Now I will say that a parent's role can change. My relationship with Mumsy has gone from parent to now friend, which is awesome right now. My friends think that she is a really cool lady because she enjoys going to movies, dinner adventures (yes I said adventures), spending time with the kids, and more. I will never understand a parent who pops out a kid, raises it, and then when adulthood comes, the parent disappears. It doesn't work that way people. We are terrible as children. The fun doesn't really start till we are grown and actually have intelligent conversations with you, possibly with a glass of wine, but then I digress.

Have you called your kids/parents today?

Patience

I have also thought I had a great amount of patience for things that I cannot change. However, lately, I have found myself extremely irritated when things do not happen when and how they should. You would think that someone with my life experience would have the patience of a saint. Nope, the older I get the more I want things my way. Pathetic. I should no better. I am always harder on myself than anyone else. That is something that I am working on. I have to be willing to cut myself some slack. I need to set my alarm to wake up earlier, get up on my schedule, and wake up slowly like I like. I am not a morning person. Hopefully with that change, my attitude for the morning and the rest of the day will be better.

Are you a morning dove or a night owl? How do you cope with your own sanity and the needs of work/life?

Health-Forced Laziness

When I eat, I have to sit still for at least 30 minutes. It is all due to my surgery I had seven years ago. I did not heed this warning last night. Cap'n was crying because he wanted down to play and I made the mistake of eating brown rice. However, it was such a tiny amount that it let food down put stuck to low that I couldn't correct it. Trust me, you don't want to know how I correct it. So from 6:30 to 9:30, I was in a chair trying to get it to stop. I couldn't even read Buggy her bedtime story. Not good at all. So needless to say, the house was not picked up. Of course I didn't not feel guilty about it at the time. I was pampered. Buggy covered me up with one of her blankets. Cap'n gave me many hugs. Mr. J made me something hot to drink to get the food to go down. That did the trick. However, I got up this morning and saw the state of the house. OMG! I spent the morning doing dishes in a furious pace in order to get to work on time. Thank the divinity I work at home. So I have a lot of work to do when I go to lunch. I am glad it's Friday.

On a happier note, I am having a craft day tomorrow. Since we are broke due to Mr. J coming back from Florida for business, I am going to catch up on scrapbooking. I have yet to finish Buggy's book (it ends when she was 1 1/2. Did I mention she is 5.). I need to finish our wedding album. I need to get her ABC workbook started and I need to get Cap'n's ready. I don't have one yet for him but I can look to see what I have. Then I have game on Sunday that I need to prepare for and of course there is the mopping, sweeping, cooking, and the laundry. Oh and one more thing....make sure the dogs have a bath.

Forgiveness

A good friend of mine lost his grandmother today. It got me thinking a lot about my family. Some of us are not talking to each other. Well we are not talking too much to each other. This wasn't always the case. We were a close family at one time. Feelings got hurt, angry words were said, and individual stubbornness ruled our current behaviors.

I am not sure if it will be welcomed, but I am going to extended the olive branches. I am going to send e-mails. Why not call? Because they do not pick up the phone, especially when they are upset. So I am going to be gentle and slow. Will it work? Don't know but I feel like I have to try. Life is too short for resentment.

How do you interact with your family?

Chores for the little ones

So as I mentioned earlier, I am a mother of two. One, let's call her Buggy, is 5 and the other, let's call him Cap'n, is just about to be 1. We don't have a large house but with four of us in it, we can dirty it up. Buggy has had chores since she was about 3. Over the early spring, Buggy and I attended a birthday party for one of her friends. Buggy came up to me later towards the end of the party and asked what else were we doing. I informed her that we have our chores to do. She agreed and went off to play. One of the parents overheard this while holding his daughter and said "Chores? What is that?". I replied that Buggy has chores and has had them. The father seemed intrigued but the daughter was definitely going to put up a fight later.

Why should kids have chores? Now mind you that Buggy's chores are appropriate for her age. However, the older she gets the more complex the chores. The easier chores will get passed down to Cap'n. Currently Buggy's chores are: pick up the shoes (we don't wear shoes in the house), pick up her room, make her bed, feed the dogs, dust reachable areas, bring her laundry to the laundry room, and clean her sink. She also has diaper duty which consists of throwing away diapers in the Diaper Genie when Cap'n is changed. Having these chores makes her feel responsible and gives her a sense of pride when she see the good she has done. Plus she really enjoys helping me. Now of course the worst chore is her room but she is a kid.

So why the post? Back to the birthday party, although the father was surprised I give Buggy chores, I was equally surprised he doesn't give his little one such tasks. How is she supposed to learn responsibility, independence, self-worth, or the meaning of unity and strength of that unity? Heck, even our cats have chores: catching mice (because I am deathly afraid of them and they are handsomely rewarded for this task). Now don't get me wrong, I do not treat the children as slaves. Mr. J and I have the lion's share of chores but the kids help out which creates more fun time for everyone.

What's your take on kids doing chores?

Wow! It's been....

I must say that it has been a great while since I have been on here. I have been thinking about my blog though. What to do with it? What should I say? What are you supposed to do with a blog? What do you say? Well, after great thought, I figured that I would just write.

I have to say the world has changed a great deal for me since my early postings. As you know I had a child and then (after many ugly frogs) remarried. We have a second child and my loving man adopted my first. I have changed jobs three times over. I even graduated with a MBA with honors. And through it all, I have discovered who I am. Now, don't get me wrong it has been an excruciating process and it is one that you never truly accomplish. However, I have a better understanding of myself than I ever have in a long time. That understanding has made me a better spouse, parent, daughter, sister, and friend. Have I lost somethings on the way? Yes, but it was mostly garbage and who really needs that anyway. The road has been bumpy but I have learned so much. Would I change anything? Maybe a couple of things (I am sure you can guess what they are) but I really do think that I needed those experiences because they make me who I am today. Now don't get me wrong, some of those experiences I could have done without. I just wished I learned them in a much healthier way. But enough of that nonsense.

So, I have decided that this blog is going to help me even more in my random thoughts, which is exactly what it was intended to be. One post may be about a book or an article I recently read. It could be a critic about a program, play, movie or music I recently enjoyed.  It could be about whatever is going on in my life. The possibilities are endless. It is up to you, dear reader, if you wish to read it. But respectfully know this, I will write if you disagree. I like debate. I encourage you to disagree, if you do it respectively. I will respect you and you respect me. That's how civilization works harmoniously.

With that said, enjoy this adventure with me. Will you, won't you join the dance?