It comes to an end...

It's over. Officially and honestly. He has found someone new. I was hoping I would be the one that does it but he did it first. I am not surprised. Is it time for me to move on? We haven't been a couple for months but it none the less it hurt like hell. I will get over it. I will survive.

Home Sweet Home

So I moved into my new place. There is one less member of my family....the ex boyfriend. We aren't together and we can not live with each other because he is selfish and I am stubborn about rules. You know rules about partying, rules about not smoking near the baby, rules about your do has to go. BTW, those are my rules. I can deal with it anymore. So I am unpacking. I am doing the best I can as a single mom. It can be difficult but I am making it work. Okay off to the salt mines

Buggy

There comes a point in your life when you are a mother and you realize that your little one is fastly become her own person. That she will for not much longer be the baby you cherish. I am realizing that now. She is eating table food now and is getting a personality. She will tell you when she doesn't like someone or whatever it is you are doing. She will let you know when she is tired and when she is happy. Even though she doesn't have completely formed words, you still understand what she is trying to get across. My time as a soppy overbearing mother is about over.

Soon I will have to change to marathon runner and sheep herder. She will be up and about getting into this and that. She will be telling me that she doesn't want to take a nap. She will be telling me that she will not eat those green beans. She will be telling me that she doesn't want a bath. Then she will learn the biggest lesson of all. She will try to tell me to be quiet. That will fail miserably. She will then learn consequence...grounded. Then she will no longer be my sweet angel but the reason why I need a nap myself. I am going to literally relish every minute.

Beware of the Mark of the Idiot

The darling boyfriend wa a complete ass to me yesterday. He decided that screaming and degrading me on the phone was going to help our relationship. Uh, right, sure....Not! Then when I got home, he tried to be all peaches and cream. Uh, not going to work. Not at this juncture. When I was quiet and just talked to the baby, he asked me what was wrong. I said that I was just waiting for an apology because no one should be forced to listen to that tirade. He later apologized but it was only half sincere. He wanted me to apologize for something that I said two weeks ago. The problem was I was right and he was clearly in the wrong. He had two friends with him when he said it and they both told him he was wrong. I did not apologize. Anyway, so that is the latest on that. The only thing I can tell myself is 3 more months and I am done.

So with this in my head, I hear of the latest from North Korea. First, let me say that I have no liking of this country. Those in power continue to let their people suffer starvation, poor living conditions, and abuse their rights as human beings on a constant and seedy basis. However, the American missionary who knew he was going into the country illegally to prove a point is a complete idiot. He would have a better chance of surviving a rabid lion attack with sausages tied around his neck. He says he is doing it to prove they have violated human rights. Duh, we know they have. Now you make more work for our politicians in order to save your ass. Why can't people think about these things before acting out?

Enough is Enough

I thought that things were going to work out. Boy was I a fool. So I sit in my little house with egg on my face while the darling boyfriend continues to disrespect me. Why? Because he can and he is an idiot. He doesn't know what he has and continues to make me the bad guy. I have had enough. I am done. He can take his "everyone owes me attitude" and cram it.

Then, I read the news. Apparently there was a terrorist plot on one of the airlines. Are you kidding me? The TSA is tightening the rules. How did they let this happen again? Did they honestly think that no one would try to attack us during one of the USA's treasured holidays. WAKE UP! Enough is enough. You need to continually have tough screenings because you never know when the next attack is. For heaven's sake, we are sending in more troops to Afghanstan. You don't think someone will be pissed. HELLO!

Thank Goodness! I was wrong!

There are sometimes in my life that I cherish the fact that I am wrong. Yesterday was one of them. I found out that I have received false information about the darling boyfriend. He is not cheating on me. In fact, he never even thought about it. I am really glad I was wrong. However with that said, he still is not moving with us this spring. Why? Because he is not going to live up to his end of the relationship and he is admitting that. He wants me to pay for his mistakes monetarily. I am not going to do that. So he says he is not going to be stuck somewhere. So in the spring, we will no longer be together.

The way I see it, I spent ten years butting together the MegaBeast's credit score into the lovely package it is today. Mine went down the hole. So I have to work on mine. That is what my plan is for next year. Fixing my fianancial profile. Alot will be done. For one, my 401K loans will be done at the end of the year. The MegaBeast's payments will be done by spring. I will be in my final year for my car. My back taxes will be paid off. I am getting a nice tax return this year. I am going to pay things off and get back on track. Plus I am moving into a better house. So the new year looks good. It's funny because all the even years are good years. All the odd years suck ass. So Bugs and I will be better off next year. Hooray!

With that in mind, I think of Obama's TARP. The government was pleasantly surprised by the fact that most of the banks are repaying their loans ahead of schedule. I believe the government thought the banks would wait till the last minute to pay them back. So they were happy they were wrong. Then the administration decided instead of dipping back into the deficit for the money for jobs, why not use the payback for the new program. OH NO! You can't do that. You have to put it in and then take it back out. WHAT! That is like depositing it into the back and taking it back out. Why do that if you have the cash in hand? It makes sense to me but maybe I am the only one.

Salvaging the Unsalvagable

I recently became aware of darling boyfriend's latest fling. He slept with another woman. I received this tip through a mutual friend who witnessed the incident. Believe it or not, I was not surprised. I had an inclination that something was going on but I couldn't prove it. Now I know. Yes, I was upset. I was shaking and sick to my stomach. However, I didn't cry. I have no more tears to shed. Something else he has taken from me.

I thought I could keep it all inside and tell him that I know after Christmas. But the more it sat in me the more it festered and gnawed at me. So I had to tell him. I told him he has till 12/27 to get out. He is no longer welcome. He denies it but not enough. I asked him to prove me and the source wrong. He said no. That answered the question. Our family is not good enough to fight for. So what can I do? I could beg. I could plead. But why salvage the unsalvagable. Apparently, he doesn't feel this relationship is important so why should I?

As this incident is happening, I read about Chris Henry's death. He was talented player and it is a shamed that he died. But did he ever come to the ephiphany that I did? I hope that not only justice is served but she feels regret, remorse, and total loss for her actions. Some people's temper builds them from what their actions could lead to. May the heavens shine down on Mr. Henry's family in their time of need.